Friday, March 27, 2009

Twittering in the Soviet Union

It's been a while since I posted anything although I've been Twittering a lot. Twittering is easier; 144 characters at a time to spew my brilliance. Also, as I told Nancy, it's kind of like the ham radio of the 21st century (and that comes from me, a ham, K4MTS). So I can either go downstairs and fire up the Kenwood and chat with a bunch or random strangers or I can open up the iPhone and pretty much do the same thing. It's always kind of funny to see people comment on the the same things you are watching or doing; Like Julie Balogna's electric wardrobe, Evgeni Malkin's latest goal, your hatred of pigeons, or your love of Sonic Diet Cherry Lime-aids.

Twittering is a nice distraction and it even helps helps me learn something every now and again. Occasionally I get on a tear about something I find hugely amusing. My latest was, "What would it be like if they had Twitter in the former Soviet Union?" I know, what the hell's wrong with me sometimes. Anyway, I blame it on my muse. You know that unseen spirit that guides poets, musicians and other creative types. Well, my muse can be seen and it looks like a jelly donut from Kuhn's Grocery.

So I blame my ramblings on a sugar high I get from these delectable delicacies. So in case you missed it on Twitter the other day here's what it would have been like if the was Twiiter in the CCCP.

ComradeWiper #Soviet Tweetup: Bulgarian Toilet Paper distributed tonight at 22.30 on the corner of Marx and Engles. Maybe Czech blue jeans too!

LeoLaporteski I get my new Soviet laptop today. Only weights 42Kg! Runs on 2 Lada batteries and blood of the proletariat. But hey, it have Vista on it!

IHeartStalin @ComradeLenin still looking good in glass box.

CCCP-1 TV What fits into Russia? You think Texas big?!? Puny Texas fit into Russia!

LonelyInIrkutsk @EastGermanFemaleWeightlifting Team look H-O-T! Helga Brundenwalder need a little shave, tho.

SteveJobovich CentralComputerPlanning group announce BelongsToTheStatePhone. 30,000,000 Rubles and 20yr. wait list. Party members only. Sorry dissidents!

KGB_GuyKawasaki Decadent Imperialist Twitterers invited to Tweetup at Lubianka Prison. Tell wife to no wait up for you. Bring winter coat.

KGB_Guy Krap, no 3G in gulag, only EDGE. I bet no FiOS here either.

MiG_Pilot63 Today is birhtday of Soviet brothers Arvill & Vilber Aeroplansky, inventors of airplane.

Pravda_CCCP Everything invented in Russia; telephone, car, Windows Vista, electric light, despair, wheel, identical concrete apartments. Everything!

Pravda_CCCP OK, not everything. Imperialist Al Gore invent Internet.